Reactivity was my challenge. I would snap. Anger would come out of nowhere. That is not a good environment for children to be in
I needed self regulation. The self-regulation that I needed to learn was a kind of down-regulation, a slowing down.
I need to be able to pause between stimulus and response. What is the stimuli that lead to your reactivity?
The exercise below allows you to practice becoming self aware and self regulated in real time so that you can be more patient, mature, and skillful.
DO NOT UNDERESTIMATE THIS EXERCISE. IT IS SIMPLE YET POWERFUL AND CAN TOTALLY CHANGE YOUR LIFE
Take 3 breaks throughout the day to really slow down and check in with your physical and emotional state. Get curious about yourself and notice how you are feeling.
Feel it fully and completely. If you are feeling angry, allow for the feeling, accept it, and yourself. (The exercise is explained in more detail in my book.)
The naming of a challenging emotion and the accepting of it reduces the intensity of it. The phenomenon is called affect labelling and has been proven by research.
- Print up the sheet below. Log your emotion 3 times a day.
- Do this exercise for 2 – 4 weeks, or until you gain an awareness of yourself. Maybe 6 months!
- Use the wheel below to help you identify your emotions.
Download the PDF here: Emotion Log